Genevieve, South Africa

Finding out that you have cancer rocks the earth from beneath your feet. Experiencing people's different reactions does the same. Some are judgmental, don't know what they're talking about, or have not experienced it for themselves, while some just think you're at death's door, and about to pop off at any moment. I had a family member looking for baby photos of me shortly after finding out about my diagnosis. That rocked me. made me feel like the person wasn't even hoping for me to beat this, I was just about being buried already, even though the full picture had not yet been outlined to me by professionals dealing with my case. Unfortunately or fortunately, my funeral has not yet happened, and I am still around. Many emotions go through you once you find out and start processing the knowledge that you have cancer. You yourself think of your mortality, your time left, if any, and what the legacy is that you leave behind. Having a husband/partner/children/loved ones makes you wonder if they'll be ok in the event of...will they cope without you, what will their life be like? Even looking at your pets, you wonder who will take care of them? Who will love them like you do, even though they are already loved. But then you find allies, champions to your cause who give you inspiration, make you hope and believe that yes, you've got this! They may be a family member, or friend, or complete stranger. I've been attending the oncology unit at Groote Schuur Hospital in Cape Town, and the doctors don't judge, they're fully committed to their patients, and patient with them. They make you feel seen, heard, and important enough. I have a husband who told me from the beginning of my journey that when I come from work, as I still work, to get into a shower or bath, and just relax, and does all the cooking, putting in lunches, etc. I have a daughter who visits at least every alternate day, just because. I have a son who takes me around to where I need to be, when I'm not feeling up to it. I have 4 fur babies who love me just because, who look out for me when I return home in the afternoons. I have family, friends, real friends, who motivate me, speak me off the ledge when needed, and who take my mind away from the fact that cancer has pervaded my being. They speak of everything else, and this helps, because cancer does not define who I am. I may have made bad choices when I was young, and these choices may have contributed to my poor health, but my warriors and champions look beyond that, and still love me, still want me to make it through this!